"The ombudsman facilitates the resolution of individual complaints which do not have a formal avenue of redress through official University channels. The ombudsman advises students on University policy and procedures, identifies and recommends changes to current practices, and communicates student concerns/issues to appropriate University officials. In addition, the Ombudsman presents workshops, conducts needs assessments and mediates disputes."
-From EMU Catalog.
This is an example of a poorly written passage according to Williams, based on clarity. In the chapter about clarity, Williams discusses that someone who is not in the field would not be sure as to what an ombudsman really is. I know I felt the same way. This passage made no sense to me because I am not even sure what this term means. So re-written, this is what this passage should look like:
"EMU provides the students with an ombudsman, a person who is available to the student to facilitate the resolution of individual complaints which do not have a formal avenue of redress through official University channels. The ombudsman advises students on University policy and procedures, identifies and recommends changes to current practices, and communicates student concerns/issues to appropriate University officials. In addition, the Ombudsman presents workshops, conducts needs assessments and mediates disputes."
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